Friday, August 11, 2006

New Airport Security



In light of the most recent terrorist threats, new security
procedures have been implemented at airports around
the world. Everyone must do their best Hannibal Lecter
impression and don straightjackets, full facial masks and
be loaded onto the plane on a dolly. The TSA feels that
these methods will truly make it safe to fly.

Give me a break. I'm not the most-traveled person in
the world, but I do fly at least 20,000 miles per year and
have seen a few things on planes. For instance, if you were
to see someone trying to ignite their water bottle or light their
1/2 can of diet sprite on fire with their cell phone or iPod,
wouldn't that seem a bit odd. Why do we need to ban these
items on planes? Has odd behavior become so commonplace
that we need to ban all electronic devices to ensure our
safety in the skies? I've seen more erratic behavior from
flight attendants than I have from most passengers.

No one wants safety on planes more than me. I tell people
that I always feel safe on planes because if there's a major
mechanical problem, there's probably nothing I can do
except trust God and the pilots. I have to assume the
pilots want to live a long and healthy life just like me.
However, you can't be 100% safe on an airplane.
Anytime you gather 300 people in a hollow tube made out
of aluminum 30,000 feet above the ground, powered by
highly explosive fuel, you're taking a chance.

Now they're saying that all electronic items may have to
stay in checked-luggage. Ok...makes a little sense.
However, you can't lock your luggage, which makes every-
thing you put in your luggage vulernable to theft, including
expensive laptops. A friend of ours actually had her laptop
stolen by the TSA at LAX. Who's watching the watchdogs?

So, unless we all want to be confined in straightjackets and
wheeled onto the plane, there will never be 100% security on
airplanes. Those who claim differently aren't living in the
real world. After all, even Hannibal Lecter got out of his
straightjacket.

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